Alright, I'll admit this one was something I decided on in the heat of the moment, and I haven't a goddamn idea why.
Here goes anyway.
Alarm clocks. Those pieces of metaphorical shit that make overwhelming amounts of noise and shit all over your dreams.
I have one myself, although it barely works due to frequently getting fly-kicked across the room.
My alarm clock is special. It's like any other alarm clock but has a mechanical bird on top of it. And as a plus, it makes really fucking weird noises when the alarm sounds... think it's supposed to be a bird chirping, but it sounds more like a squirrel in
labor being blended from the feet up in a smoothie machine.
So, like, I've got this thing sitting beside my bed.... like 50cm from where my head is, okay? So, at 7am every day, I receive a
"fuck you" from the almighty, in the form of a really fucking loud demented-sounding noise and some rotor noises in the background as it pitiably attempts to move around. Wanna know what really tops it off? The fucking button to turn it off is located at the impossible-to-reach back of the thing, and is a REAL bitch to switch. It takes roughly 15 seconds full effort to flip it, and by that point you've picked it up and launched it across the room.
So, the conclusion: I fucking hate alarm clocks, and they put me in a bad mood all day long. Well.. it's not like I'm ever in a good mood anyway, but you get my point.
