You ever just wake up one day and wondered what the fuck you're doing on this planet? Me too.
After somehow "finishing" university, I was not-too-surprised to find out that having any sort of university qualification is less useful than headbutting a wall to cure a headache.
Even more so if the university has conveniently forgotten to send you the bit of paper saying you achieved anything for almost a year. Brilliant.
My entire time in my university course, the lecturers told us we were unlikely to get work in the field of study we had. Mine being journalism. The lecturers also never hesitated to tell us that we would never truly write our own opinions, but instead the opinions of whatever outlet had chosen to employ us. Additionally, that should we "go against the grain", our careers would likely be ended by whatever outlet we work for. Honestly, I'm somewhat glad I didn't end up with a job as soulless as that.
So. Back to where I was when I was some angsty 16 year old, applying for literally every job advertised. And not getting any answers at all. See, I live in a small fishing town, with a population of.. I'd say 30k. Not exactly much of an industry here to offer jobs, and the few jobs that do surface are quickly snapped up by those who know the empoyers. Me being a bit of a recluse... I don't know employers. You see the issue.
What makes this so much better though? A pandemic. A nice big pandemic. Surviving off a meager unemployment stipend is one thing, but trying to buy food during a pendemic is another. Its May as I write this, and people are still shovelling entire shelves into their trolleys shemlessly, with rabid eyes. Most businesses are closed, so almost no jobs surface, The few that do surface are for "essential" industry such as NHS staff, carers for the elderly and infirm, and supermarket jobs. Not being a doctor, a trained carer, and having an entire town to compete with for a role in stacking Oreos onto a shelf... not exactly any prospets.
Adult life sucks. And hell, I'm only 22. There's worse still to come, given the grim acceptance I see on the faces of those older than me, and their resigned sighs every time something goes wrong for them. When I was a kid, I always assumed I'd probably be dead somewhere before I was an adult. I'm kinda just here, in the end. With no plans. Or goals. Or cares, honestly. Its somewhere between the most liberating thing ever and the worst experience of my life, with some sprinklings of disaster and fortune to throw me off every time I get used to stuff.
I'm tempted to start eating crayons, buy one of those town road map carpet things, and collect Action Man models. Might change things up a little.
